Val Doonican was Right .....

He he ..... I can just see you with your calculators working out how old I am. And if you remember his cardie and the rocking chair – then you can’t be far off my great age either.

Remember with great age - comes great wisdom J

A line of the song Val’s best remembered for came into my head this morning. I’d stepped out to walk down to collect the post from the plastic bin at the end of our drive about a mile away. I am blessed to live in one of the MOST stunningly beautiful parts of Mid-Wales.  Rabbits to the left of me, grazing lambs to the right and Red Kites circling lazily overhead.

If I turn to the North-West I can see the ridge of Cader Idris mountain sharp against the skyline and to the South East the mist hanging over the valley and the River Rhiw.

So what am I doing?  I am walking, head down, pondering. Fretting away at niggling worries AND chewing my lip for maximum anxiety effect - not to mention the wrinkles I’m growing with my furrowed brow. When I reach the gate and collect the post from the bin I stop. Then it hits me. I have reached the end of the road and I have seen nothing, nothing – well other than the mud, stones and puddles at my feet for the last mile.

“Erm hello Lesley?” My ears prick up – important message to self coming in over the air waves. “Just what do you think you are doing?” Internal Self has clearly decided to give External Self a good talking to this morning – so I’d better listen up.

“Straighten that spine girl – go on really stretch it. You might even find another half inch of height in there if you really try. Good. Now, drop your shoulders - ALL the way my girl. Wearing them as earrings is never a good plan. Now lift your head up. Go on chin UP! That’s it ALL the way. Uh huh! Clever clogs. No, not so your nose is pointing at the sky eejit – just so you can ‘look the world right in the eye”. Now breathe and look around you slowly, take it all in. Press the pause button on that infernal, internal chatter and let everything calm down inside. Breathe .......Keep looking around.Slow it all down, take it all in. Now doesn’t that feel better?”

And it did. The internal hassle and bustle and worry bead counting had stopped. My heart rate was steady and my worries seemed far less important. I looked at the beauty around me, heard the noises of the countryside, felt the breeze on my face and could see what lay all around me. Wowzer! I set off back up the drive – this time with my head up, my back straight and breathing more easily and openly.  Once home I went upstairs to my office, dumped all my worries down on a list, made a cup of tea and started to work through them.

Life is not fair, life is hard and sad and full of hurdles to be overcome. That IS the nature of life. However, it is also GOOD and how we view it, determines how we deal with it. In Val Doonican’s song a mother gives her son sound advice. When you look directly at what lies ahead of you, take in the bigger picture with a clear view - your energy and feeling levels shift into a more positive frame. You are better equipped to tackle what needs to be done.

So all together now girls” Walk tall, walk straight... and look the world right in the eye”

Wild Women – Go DO!

The Tiger in the Bedroom

Lest you think this is a euphemism for an extremely lively and exciting love life – think again. The tiger in question was in my head, in my dream and in my bed this morning. “So what’s the deal?  You’re a wild woman. You’re bound to have an overactive imagination.”

Hmm true. Yes, I do have very vivid dreams from time to time, and they are often significant. However, it’s been very quiet on the nocturnal fantasy front for a while. Hence why a large, very, very vibrant orange and black, extremely hungry and clearly hunting for his next meal sort of a tiger registered as off the Dream Richter scale.

So dramatically powerful was this beast that I woke up totally discombobulated and had a quick check to see that it was not lurking behind the wardrobe. Millie my Yorkshire terrier WAS at the foot of the bed – tho’ looking totally bemused.

Anyway, back to the tiger. I am now trying to make some sense of the ‘message’ I was given. My conclusion, after 2 cups of strong tea, is that my subconscious has clearly being trying to tell me things quietly and persistently these last few weeks.  As I have failed to pay sufficient attention – it decided to shout at me. i.e. Here is a very scary tiger coming to eat you – do something! Geddit?

OK, OK I got it. Message roughly translated reads “Call yourself a Wild Woman - Huh? Then get up face your fears and tame this wild and scary thing before it eats you.”

So let’s backtrack to the dream. There I am stumbling on my hands and knees around the back of a car (please don’t ask why). The fact that it is on my hands and knees is very significant.  And then WOW – right in my face is the tiger.  We are nose to nose – so close I can see its whiskers, the fluffy little hairs on its nose oh...... and how could I forget – the HUGE canines. Yikes! Yikes! and triple Yikes. I slowly get up, turn and walk away purposeful-like. ‘Tis never a good idea to run in case the tiger thinks to give chase.

Then magically a shed appears. Yes, I said - shed.  You know, your common or garden 6 x 4 shed and helpfully the door is open. Whew. I dash in and close the door. Safe - or so  I think. Whoops the other end of the shed is also open.......I pause to reflect for a nanosecond that some sadist is designing this dream for me... and the tiger is now at the other door licking his lips.

Just at that movement I see the zoo keeper – a young woman. She looks extraordinarily like me. Well like me with long hair about 30 years ago. “Help!”  I squeak– could you please feed the tiger ..........NOW! “Sure.” The young woman responds by lobbing a huge steak - you know the sort you see in every Disney cartoon with the white fat round the outside and the bone in the middle. The tiger leaps, catches it in mid air and retires to the corner to chomp happily.

I close the shed door. I am now safe but in the dark. The tiger is still out there. Hmm. That wasn’t too clever. I do not wish to live in the shed. Besides I have to get up soon, feed the chickens, walk the dogs and start work at my PC.

I open the door. The tiger is curled up in the corner, contentedly licking its lips and comfortably replete after eating the huge steak. I walk up to it. It is still huge, orange (please see paragraph above for full description) .....yet he poses no threat. I turn and walk away. The young woman is waves and sends a friendly grin.

Aha! A light bulb moment dawns: 

Confucius he say “Face the tiger down. Call on your inner reserves when you need help. Ask and it will come. The solution may be very simple and you already have the answer within you.”

The chickens have been fed, the dogs walked, I’m back at my PC and sending out joining instructions for our next Go Wild for a Change – Personal Discovery weekend.

If you like my Blog please pass it on. My dream is to create and combine witha growing community of wild women, all sharing their stories and lessons for living life to the full.

45 Lessons for Life

This is something we ALL should read at least once a week. Make sure to read to the end. It was written by Regina Brent, 90 yrs old who was a regular columnist of the Plain Dealer, a major daily newspaper in Cleveland, Ohio. It's so good I wish I had written it.

“To celebrate growing older I once wrote the 45 lessons life taught me. It is the most requested column I have ever written”. 

1.       Life isn’t fair, but it is still good

2.       When in doubt, just take the next small step

3.       Life is too short to waste time hating anyone

4.       Your job won’t take care of you when you are sick. Your friends and family will. Stay in touch

5.       Pay off your credit cards every month

6.       You don’t have to win every argument. Agree to disagree

7.       Cry with someone. It’s more healing that crying alone

8.       It’s OK to get angry with God. He can take it

9.       Save for retirement starting with your first pay packet

10.   When it comes to chocolate, resistance is futile

11.   Make peace with your past so that it won’t screw up your present

12.   It’s OK to let your children see you cry

13.   Don’t compare your life to others. You have no idea what their journey is all about

14.   If a relationship has to be secret, you shouldn’t be in it

15.   Everything can change in the blink of an eye. Don’t worry – God never blinks

16.   Take a deep breath. It calms the mind

17.   Get rid of anything that isn’t useful, beautiful or joyful

18.   Whatever doesn’t kill you really does make you stronger

19.   It’s never too late to have a happy childhood. But the second one is up to you and no one else

20.   When it comes to going after what you love in life – don’t take no for an answer

21.   Burn the candles, use the nice sheets, wear the fancy lingerie. Don’t save it for a special occasion. Today is special.

22.   Over prepare, then go with the flow

23.   Be eccentric now, Don’t wait for old age to wear purple

24.   The most important sex organ is the brain

25.   No one is in charge of your happiness but you

26.   Frame every so called disaster with these words “In 5 years will this matter”

27.   Always choose life

28.   Forgive everyone everything

29.   What other people think of you is none of you business

30.   Time heals almost everything. Give time time

31.   However good or bad a situation is, it will change

32.   Don’t take yourself so seriously – no one else does

33.   Believe in miracles

34.   God loves you because of who God is…. not because of anything you did or didn’t do

35.   Don’t audit life. Show up and make the most of now

36.   Growing old beats the alternative – dying young

37.   Your children only get one childhood

38.   All that matters in the end is that you loved

39.   Get outside every day. Miracles are waiting everywhere

40.   If we threw all our problems in a pile and saw everyone elses, we’d grab ours back

41.   Envy is a waste of time . You already have everything you need

42.   The best is yet to come…

43.   No matter how you feel, get up, get dressed and show up

44.   Yield

45.   Life isn’t tied with a bow… but is still a  gift.